Filed under: I might be the laziest human being ever, Is channel surfing a sport?
I joined the gym.
:: Go ahead, laugh. I’ll pause for a moment while you all compose yourselves. ::
Are you done? Okay, good. Well, it’s true. The girl whose boyfriend dubs her “the laziest human being ever” finally got sick of the mirror’s reflection and shelled out the dough for gym privileges after several months of failed attempts at in-home workouts. Obviously, when you’ve skipped anything even remotely similar to exercise for nearly two years – since college graduation in May 2007 – getting back into the swing of things isn’t simple.
It started with the Wii Fit. Not only was that fun – it was a video game, after all – but it encompassed a variety of exercises, from aerobic to weight training to yoga. I really enjoyed it. But my dedication began to wane after a few short weeks when I’d turn to my television rather than the adjacent Wii. Thus, it was time to try something else.
After a brief period of extreme laziness, again, I bought “Flirty Girl Fitness.”* The infomercials for this product were appearing constantly and after much consideration, I spent $40 (approximately) on a package of four DVDs that would seemingly trim my waistline while providing a fun, dance-like workout. I anticipated the sexual nature of the exercises – one had to considering the optional $100 stripper pole purchase (which I did not make) – but I surely underestimated how inadequate and uncomfortable I’d feel completing each maneuver. And unfortunately, after proficiently learning the routines and completing them a few times each, regularly, the DVDs weren’t much of a challenge anymore.
And so came the momentous decision to find a local gym.
Most seemed out of my price range, or wanted a long-term contract that included an annual “upgrade” fee, or weren’t open on my ONE day off each week. Clearly, none of those would work. And then a beacon of light appeared. A new gym opened close to my house – and it remains the closest gym in proximity to my home – which would cost me a mere $30/month with no contract, no annual fee and, aside from a one-time $13 key fee (because it’s accessible 24/7), no additional fees ever. Sign me up!!
I’ve been a member for less than one week with two rounds already under my belt. A third is planned for tomorrow. But it’s great to finally be back in the gym, getting my fat ass in shape. Although I likely and sadly waited a bit too long to make that choice, seeing as the non-sweatpants gym pants I wore two years ago no longer properly fit**. Crappy, right? Yet it only proves that it’s about damn time I motivate myself to make some changes.
Will I be altering my diet? Hell no. Sure, I’m aware that eating healthy is a rather important component in weight loss. However, I was fairly content with the body I had in college just by maintaining a more-active lifestyle as opposed to the sedentary one I have now. I’m entirely convinced that foregoing everything I love to eat for rabbit food would only make me miserable and less likely to succeed. So I’m doing this my way and hoping it works.
And no worries folks, I won’t be turning this into a “fat-burning blog” any time soon. I just wanted to make my efforts known and maybe all of you can help keep me on the right path.
So keep your fingers crossed because, really, I can’t afford Tony Little’s “Gazelle” and I surely don’t have the dolla dolla bills for plastic surgery … unless I start putting my Flirty Girl Fitness skills to good use. Hm, now there’s a thought!
* Why I’m admitting that ridiculous purchase on my blog, I’m not entirely sure, but I suppose it’s a vital element to this story.
** And by “properly fit,” I really mean no longer button around my expansive waistline. =(
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